Archive for the Movies Category

Fireproof

Posted in Movies with tags , , , , on 2008/10/29 by NY4JB

If you are looking for a movie full of action, violence, special effects and sex this is not the movie for you; this is a really good movie. If you are married; have ever been in love; or plan to be either of those you should see this movie, actually you need to watch this movie. Here are my observations about the scenario presented in the film.

The couple has been married for about 7 years, they have no children, money is not a major issue (more on that later), their house is clean and tidy, they are both attractive and in good physical shape, in fact the only outwardly visible problem is that their work situation doesn’t allow them to spend much time together (Caleb is a fireman working 2 days on and 2 days off, Catherine works a regular office schedule doing PR for a hospital).

Well, you would think since they don’t see each other very much it would be like date night when they do spend time together, but, it doesn’t work out that way. What went wrong isn’t presented in detail; we do know that Caleb has become addicted to internet pornography and Catherine stopped preparing meals because Caleb doesn’t let her know when he will be home. So, when they do see each other they fight over who ate the last piece of pizza or who should buy groceries or some other petty problem.

About money… although they have more than enough money for all the basics of suburban life there is still a problem in this area. Caleb has been saving for a boat, apparently a very nice boat as he has twenty-odd thousand dollars saved. Catherine would like to do some add-ons to the house, like landscaping, and he is quick to point out that those are wants not needs and that he deserves a boat. Here’s where it gets tough; her mother has had a stroke and needs some new equipment to be more comfortable and have a decent quality of life. A new wheel chair and hospital bed are out of reach for her father’s finances. Should Caleb give up his dream boat? It’s made clear that it will take his entire savings to buy the equipment. I think this would be a struggle for most people, even if we don’t want to admit it.

The plot thickens. A doctor where Catherine works has taken an interest in her and even donates money so that her mother can have the new equipment. The girls at the hospital now have something to gossip about as the interest is obviously mutual and wrong. I don’t give the doctor any leniency as he is totally in the wrong to be flirting with another man’s wife. If he was truly benevolent he could have made an anonymous contribution for the equipment for her mother (even that is questionable since if he were minding his own business he wouldn’t have known about her mother’s needs). Catherine is also in the wrong here; her flirtation is the equivalent to Caleb’s problem with pornography; she found another place to fulfill her needs.

So what happened? They failed to see that loving somebody (or something) is a choice. Whatever we put our time and effort (and money) into will become what we care about most. We can guide our passions but this is easier to say than to do and most of us are not strong enough on our own to stay focused, we need God’s help. I know when it comes to hobbies I tend drift, becoming passionate about one for a while, losing interest and moving on to another. That may be alright for hobbies but it is not alright when it comes to serving God and the wife I promised to love ‘till death do we part.

So, I am on Day 1 of The Love Dare, which is about patience.

1 Corinthians 13:4 “Love is patient and kind…” (NLT)

Ephesians 4:2 “Always be humble and gentle. Be patient with each other, making allowance for each other’s faults because of your love.” (NLT)

The challenge is simply going 24 hours without saying anything negative to your spouse. This may be easier in the movie than in real life because in the movie they didn’t see each other very often so Caleb only had to hold his tongue for a few minutes. Perhaps, I’m being too hard on myself but I don’t think I’ve made it 24 hours yet. I think this is a challenge that could take a lifetime to perfect.

In the movie, it takes a lot of sacrifice for Caleb to win back his wife but how much sacrifice did it take to win her in the first place? Why does it seem easier when we are trying to get what we don’t have and it becomes difficult once we have it? Does this apply to worship as well? Do we take God for granted once we know we have salvation?

Bottom line – there are things I do that drive my wife crazy and things she does that drive me crazy. So we have a choice, we can get mad and fight, or we can choose to love each other. It’s not easy and I’m still working on it and will be for as long as she will have me…and with God’s help that will be for the rest of our lives.

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